The upcoming holiday season always seems to work like a magnifying glass in social affairs. We can see in bold letters what the essence of a relationship looks like.
In many cases, this means that we experience a beautiful closeness and a warmhearted connection. In others, we may feel more tension and stress with others than usual.
This is not only true for our family relationships but for all our social interactions. We never know what sticks in people’s mind and what in the long run they associate with us.
I remember a music teacher I had when I was a child. She ate bananas during the lessons with me. Here is the problem: I bananas. I once had to throw up after eating too much of them in kindergarten.
I also remember that she criticised me. She told me to do seemingly everything different each week. And I used to get more scared of screwing up something, the farther down the page I got. Her system was: ONE little mistake = punishment of another week of repetition. Then I would have to practice the whole damn thing for the next week AGAIN.
Which – at the end – made a sum total of 5 pieces a year ;o)
I am sure she was a nice lady and had all the best for me in her mind. I am convinced she was a talented musician with a lot of knowledge and ability.
But what sticked to my brain was the terrible banana perfume of the room, the idea that I made seemingly everything wrong and that a long etude resembled a ride on a horror train. The danger of making one teeny, tiny mistake would increase constantly resulting in even one MORE week of this horror piece.
Needless to say that I started to hate long pieces… they made me scared of looking like an idiot. Which I probably was and I did not want to feel that. I did not know what I know today: we all are now and then a little bit of an idiot, especially when we do learn a new skill.
The bottom line is: if we want to build beautiful human bonds we have to make sure our banana eating, criticising and punishing is in proportion to telling our folks how awesome they are and how much we appreciate them.
If you like to challenge yourself, here is some true christmas training for you:
Be a sweetheart. When you notice something beautiful in people, go ahead and tell them. This is a really nice exercise. It is not based on fakery or flattery – but it shows people who YOU truly are, a person who cares and sees the positive in the world.
And of course we all sometimes have banana moments, but if the real you is showing up most of the time, they are not the only lasting impression.
I wish you harmonious and wonderful holidays,
take good care of yourself and your loved ones,
with so much love,
Two ps coming up!!
ps1: Sadly, three bassoons have been stolen. When Mr. Moosmann went to Portugal for an exhibition, the Contrabassoon model 300, Nr. 8721, Bassoon model 111, Nr. 8855 and Bassoon model 222E Nr. 7979 have been stolen. If you come across one or all of them, please tell us! Mr. Moosmann of course would be more than happy to get them back!
ps2: We have the honor and privilege to write a commissioned piece for Jeunesses Musicales Suisse and their Finally Bassoon Festival 2019. An amazing event with wonderful people! Please check it out HERE.