Dale Carnegie told the story that dogs have mastered one great skill: The art of making friends.
You can be many meters away and they start waging their tales. A sign without words, that they like you are there. When you approach them and take the time to pet them, they show happiness, jump up and down. They are excited about your presence.
What does the dog do?
The dog is interested in people in a genuine way.
Not slimy, not sleezy – just open and natural.
During the day we do many different things. The common denomnator – no matter what we do – usually is people. Life is all about being around people. Even if our job is solitary, at the end of the day we usually think of people and we interact with them.
I remember when I first visited a nuns’ monastery. I was part of a little group of children who were singing to collect money for the church and some charity. We were invited for lunch and I saw nuns there very closely. I had the image in my mind, they would be very silent and in prayer all day.
What we found at the monastery were some very lively and chatty nuns. Their garment was black as it usually is for catholic nuns. But their behaviour was brightly colourful and social.
Being friendly makes all the difference in the world.
If we make it easy for others to like us, we feel happier, we enjoy life, we feel that we are alive. Even our health benefits when we experience that others care about us.
Still, I wonder why in school so much irrelevant babble is being talked about, but how to be liked by others and just a good person is kept a total secret. There are no school books about this most important subject. You are not taught how to be happy, likeable and a cherished person. It obviously is not considered something you should know.
Looks like dogs know a lot more than humans in this regard.
How could we be as artful in making friends as they are? Here are some ideas:
Listen: We have two ears and one mouth.
This means we can try listening twice as much as talking.
Don’t interrupt others and be silent like a dog (if he is well mannered).
Body Language: Have an open posture, look people in the eyes.
The dog uses no words but is understood very well.
Be kind: Talk well about other people. Gossiping puts dirt on yourself.
A dog does not chat about his owner or his peers.
Spread optimism: Everybody prefers the company of a gentle, polite and sweet person.
Dogs are effortlessly excited about small things. One dog treat and the world is fantastic!
And no worries! I promise to be liked you don’t have to jump up and down and lick peoples faces 😉 Just be the wonderful you you naturally are.
Much love,
Anselma
